April 30, 2013

something like the truth in hopping over the
wooly bear caterpillar on
the sidewalk.

April 29, 2013

everyday is tedious.  it is always there.  i do believe there can be truth in a sewer.

if i find some kind of truth in this sewer, it may relieve the tedium.

i am not a girl who misses much.  i am looking for some kind of truth, not balance.

you work harder for your balance.  my stance is not without its difficulties.

April 28, 2013

i always have one foot on the ground.

you always manage to have two.

arthur, only you would say something like that.  i love you deeply.

in your case, it may be too early to tell.

April 26, 2013

he said that his memory was unreliable.

he said that he would tell my story one day.

April 25, 2013

the unreliable narrator!  i think i know who he is.  i met him during the war.  he was injured.  before you.

i hope he is not trying to explain us.  we don't need a narrator.  they are leeches.

someone seems to be observing us.  a phlegmatic.  passive aggressive.  hesitant to show his face.

April 24, 2013

arthur, who is the owner of that voice cutting in?  can you hear him?

April 23, 2013

the fourth one is so old fashioned.  it really isn't even worth mentioning.

he is talking about the four temperaments, the four humors.  he has forgotten one.

choleric / yellow bile

adele was melancholic.  black bile.

blood / sanguine

April 22, 2013

so arthur and adele each struggled with their freedoms, even
though they knew that they were in a much better position
than the others in that regard.

these days i wouldn't know who i am without the make-up.  it's all about being alone.  or not.

April 21, 2013

April 19, 2013

i will see grisha perelman on the street in early evening.  i will try to wave, and then he will be gone.

i would just like to walk on the same street with grisha.  i may not even try to talk to him.

i find it easier going back these days.  forward is so grueling. still, grisha is such a special case.

motives are usually concealed.  your motives even more so. you may make these trips. i will always love you.

April 18, 2013

when i think of curses, i think of kenneth anger and the egyptians.  i would like to go there too!

you will have to find him.  you! with your flypaper memory!  it can be a curse, of course.

April 17, 2013

that's amusing.  i hate the sight of blood but i have it in my veins.  do you want me to forget about grisha?

is your ship going in circles?  you and arp and williams.  it sounds like a whirlpool of decadence.

i get carried away.  i adore you arthur.  besides, you know very well that i am on the ship with the poets.

April 16, 2013

 i can be with you, but i cannot travel with you.  i am trapped in this hospital,  but i can still
be with you.  would you want me to be there?  grisha seems to your cup of tea.  go alone.  i love you.

April 15, 2013

i see him lacing his shoes.  buttoning his shirt.  it is always the small proprieties.

i yearn for perelman.  i know where he is.  will you come?